A bit of self-closure: I want to talk about something I have not been good at myself.
Our Habits Start Early
Being a first born, I was given a lot of responsibility early in life.
This is a theme which has continued throughout my life, in my early career, and now in this latest 30 year chapter of being a coach and therapist (and a bit of a hypocrite it would seem): always putting people first, being responsible.
And isn’t that lovely? Well, yes it is. But there has been a huge cost. My health has not been great. I am understating it – it has been poor at times. OK, very poor at times: it’s like my body has been yelling at me “For beep-beep’s sake, will you rest” (a command not a question). My response? “Sure – when I’ve done this”. Guess what? That innocuous “this” is a long list of responsibilities that never end. And I mean never. But I continued with “I will rest when ….” And I love what I do and I like who I am but, seriously, rest.
Soooo, I am coming late to the party.
Learn From My Mistakes
I implore you to learn from my mistakes. As I have at last learned. I could have learned much sooner but we are where we are. I would say I am pretty damn good at self-care now. But I still have to catch myself. Old habits die hard as they say. I have had to give myself permission to put me first. Adulting my inner child. I have had to remember that I am more use to others when I am strong physically, healthy and living a life of balance so that I can give better and be a better example to others. Being a good example is something I have prided myself on, but I have deluded myself on the self-care part. It is not something that can wait. It is an investment in yourself, your future, the quality of your life and the quality of your relationships.
It’s Self-Care Awareness Month
Today, 24th July 2025, marks the beginning of Self-Care Awareness Month. And I would like to invite you to join me. Self-care is more than just a bubble-bath and face mask. It is really, really nurturing yourself. Like you matter. It is not noble to put yourself last. It isn’t wise. It isn’t selfless. It’s a delusion that everything will work out, even if you do nothing to make it so. Mental, physical, emotional, social and spiritual health are all important. You can’t dodge one thinking the othes will hold up the fort.
Changing the Habits of a Lifetime
Part of what has worked for me is very strong boundaries, detaching from some relationships that felt unhealthy. It is also as simple as going to my favourite coffee shop as soon as they open (I am a morning person), having a coffee, a pastry and sit with my gorgeous dog, a good book and some calm, beautiful music playing. Bliss. I can’t tell you how much that half-hour restores me. I go first thing because it’s a good start to the day, most people are asleep and so the place is quiet, restful. I swear it’s better than a holiday (talk about a cheap date!).
Going Deeper
When I work with clients who are suffering from some kind of ailment, I always ask permission for me to look at the emotional correlation of these. It nearly always reveals something profound and relevant, as it did for me. It can be a catalyst for meaningful change. For me, it opened my eyes to some truths I was ignoring.
I also enjoy a reiki treatment, a facial or an Indian Head Massage: it feels so indulgent yet so healing to have someone give to you for a change. And, of course, a lovely walk in nature can feel tremendously grounding and even healing when you really connect with your surroundings. And I love, love, love yoga which is a much deeper practice than people know: it not only works on the body, but on the spirit and can soothe/process emotions too. I talk about this in one of my YouTube How to Manage Stress episodes.
From Me to You
Self-care is also about self-exploration, self-honesty and self-growth. It just reaches parts of self-care that others can’t. And this is what I love doing with my clients, because it’s hard on your own. I have also put together a freebie for you: 20 Self-Care Tips for you to explore. Most of them are less obvious (we know about diet, exercise and nutrition), but beneficial nonetheless. It is “cousin” to another freebie: 20 (Mostly Free) Tips to Boost Your Immune System. This was shared in a recent newsletter I ssent out. If you aren’t subscribed, do subscribe now (in the box on the right) so you don’t miss out on other useful content that I share. In addition, you will have free access to an insight tool to help you understand yourself better.
Do have a read, and look to implement new strategies that support you, so you are not looking back on your life and wishing you had taken better care. And do share this: I can’t think of a living soul who would not benefit. If you want extra help (making change can be difficult on your own), do get in touch to find out how I could support you on your journey.
To your health and happiness.
PS I have an important 21st Tip in my newsletter. If you haven’t subscribed, do so now (top right of this page) and I will send it to you. It’s a doozy. Offer is for this month only so act now!
(C) Tricia Woolfrey
